I'm feeling completely depressed after a busy (but fruitful) week getting loads of inspiration for my illustration work, but it seems that inspiration has left the building as far as this project is going this week. I am sick to the back teeth of filling out forms instead of just getting on with it. I know that on Monday I will have to have my work photographed for the Degree Show catalogue, and I know that photos will be of the drawings I did last semester, which seem to bear little resemblance to what I envisage will become of my installation.
I don't like to be in my studio at Greestone at the moment; there are always far too many distractions, and my heart is in my illustration work at the moment. I need time to breathe, and to rid myself of what seems like completely contradictory advice. Last week I felt there was a clear path ahead, but now things have started to go into the realms of complete confusion, and I'd rather not go there.
One positive thing to have come out of today, that I will probably appreciate more next week than I do right now, is that I saw a guy making an animation in the computer room that was similar to my original one, so I asked him what he was up to. I told him that I'd done something similar before, and offered some advice. He had seen my work in my studio, and commented that he thought a guy had done it.
To me this is a compliment, because I am resenting deeply any kind of perception that my work has been made by a "screaming fan", or has anything to do with that, and all people keep telling me is that I SHOULD be doing that, and I just can't see it, I can't take that seriously, but I suppose that's the point... anyway, I'm glad he thought that, as it appeals to the rebellious tomboy in me ;-)
The poor guy seemed to be having no luck figuring out how to do what he wanted to do, and I could've offered more help, but I decided to go and leave the Valentines cards that I made for Illustration there and go home early, so that I can stay at home and possibly work out my storyboards properly on my own tomorrow.
I'm going on strike!
OK! I think I have finally cracked it ;-)
I couldn't sleep at all last night, so I kept reading The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, a book that appeared in a blog written by Magne last month, that subsequently disappeared... there was a long list of recommendations, but knowing that my work has been about time, this one struck a chord, as I suspect Magne may well have known... Art! Time! Coincidence! Birds and Borges - everything I was missing is only fully realised now that I've finished the book (that's what I was doing to take my mind off my seeming lack of inspiration!). I've just read the last few chapters, and towards the end it appeared; each chapter is dated, with the ages that the characters Clare and Henry are at the time, there appeared a chapter "Saturday, July 12th, 2008"
This date will be my 32nd birthday, which coincides with the fact that the faculty of Illustration have booked a space for us to exhibit at New Designers in London - therefore I was planning to celebrate my birthday that weekend in London.... I have informed Magne via his myspace of this, informally invited him to come and see my work, I am considering the same for my Fine Art Degree Show - A-ha will be in London for the weekend after the Fine Art Degree Show, so they could possibly have time to come and see my work. Last week I wrote a question for Magne in a forum in which questions are being chosen for the man himself to answer... these will be chosen tomorrow! I have invited Morten, Magne and Pal to the degree show.... I may have to rephrase the question in light of my epiphany....
Today, John and I were discussing the banner I took to the Liverpool gig in 2006. The conversation confused me in my bewildered and sleep deprived state, but now everything is clear..... the banner expresses my wish, a wish that still remains unfulfilled - if the guys could make it to the degree show, it would be a work of GENIUS! Mags is a genius!
I have also figured out that I don't need to worry about storyboards! What was I thinking!! All I need to do, is to carry on the way I was working before, only document what has happened so far, and make up what happens next (ie if A-ha actually show up at the Degree Show, or if I meet them at New Designers...)
The strike is off! I have work to do tomorrow!
This is a copy of the banner I took to Liverpool
This is what I did to it, to bring it up to date following my revelation, however, I'm also in the process of editing the comic book images that I used if they will fit in the made up version I'm making... the text is so small and lengthy that it couldn't really be read if this was a banner at a gig. Which is interesting.... this won't be for a gig, it will be for a gallery. I might change the text later though, it depends what people say about it.